oh man, this is kind of fantastic in a really bad way
My Sister’s Actual Home Run Derby Texts
I wasn’t home to catch the beginning of the Derby, but fortunately my sister was there to fill in. Her informative text messages:
- “Wow, that Jose Bautista sure can hit a ball with a bat am I right?!!?!?!”
- “Where’s Sammy Sosa?”
- “Where’s Ken Griffey Jr?”
- “When does Drew Bledsoe hit?”
- “Jackie Robinson is going to win. Jackie Robinson always wins.”
- “Also, Wayne Gretzky and Detleft Schrempf. SCCCCHHHHREEEEMMMMPPFF.”
- “These are the only sports people I know.”
- “Can I write a guest column?”
6/16/12: All three Yankees outfielders are confused by a defensive substitution in the bottom of the eighth
The White Sox 1st round draft pick (13th overall), Courtney Hawkins, does a backflip live on MLB Network.
Breaking: Ozzie Smith sues for copyright infringement.
Pittsburgh Pirates right-hander and first ballot inductee into The Hall of Jeffs, Jeff Karstens, brought his game face to last night’s game against Magic Johnson’s shiny new toy at Chavez Ravine last night. Unfortunately, he left his game arm at home. Mayor McDerp pitched five innings, walking one and fanning three, while surrendering three earned runs on seven hits in the Pirates’ 3-2 loss. Matt Kemp continued to be frighteningly good at baseball, James Loney’s quest to smash Bill Bergen’s consecutive hitless at-bats streak was thwarted by a seeing eye single in the 5-6 hole, and Javy Guerra is on pace to save 147 games this season.
But far more important than any of that big ol’ pile of horesefeathers is that…
Jeff Karstens still has a face.
This is the eleventh installment in our ongoing tribute to him. And his face.
(Click the pic for a SCEPTACULER SLIEDSHWE)
Frikking love his face. just the best.
